Review: ‘Novocaine’ Is A Sweet, Silly, Effed-Up Puppy of a Punch-Em-Up

Tom Cruise. Keanu Reeves. Jason Statham. Jack Quaid. OK, fine — we’re probably never going to say “Jack Quaid” in the same breath as other action megastars, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t currently starring in one of the most thrilling and fun action movies we’re likely to get all year. It’s got solid fights, gnarly kills, and a sick sense of humor, but its secret weapon is something in short supply in this genre: Genuine heart - and that heart is all thanks to Quaid. Novocaine proves that maybe we don’t need big, muscly megastars anchoring our shoot-em-ups, blazing swaths of justice through waves of faceless goons. Maybe we just need a big beanpole of a guy in a silly tie trying to save a girl while getting punched a lot.

Quaid stars as Nathan Caine, an assistant bank manager with a health condition that makes him insensitive to pain. It’s a nifty conceit for an action flick, but the movie shines as writer Lars Jacobson puts that conceit through its paces, expanding on it and weaving it into the plot. The first act spends a lot of time establishing how not-cool this condition is for Nate. He’s on a liquid diet because he could bite his tongue while chewing and not realize it, then choke. Nate has taught himself first aid so he can patch himself up, since he’s never sure how long it will take for him to notice that he’s bleeding. Even his nickname, “Novocaine,” isn’t some cool badass moniker - it’s just the name his middle school bullies gave him while beating him up for fun. His whole life has been spent trying to keep himself safe, and it’s worked. The average life expectancy for someone with his condition is 25 years, so he’s already beaten the odds. But when he takes a chance on a bite of cherry pie offered to him by Sherry, the girl of his dreams, it’s just the first of many dangerous steps outside of his comfort zone.

Sherry is a mysterious and gorgeous teller at the bank where Nate works, and they only spend one memorable evening together before everything goes haywire. It’s doesn’t matter, though, because Sherry is played by Amber Midthunder (Prey) and you’ll fall as hard for her as Nate does when she tricks his old school bully into drinking a shot of ghost pepper hot sauce (a shot that Nate drinks without a wince) and then tells him she’s going home with him. What matters is that when Sherry is taken hostage the next day by three bank robbers in Santa suits, there isn’t a doubt in your mind as to why Nate would try so hard to chase them down and save her. The only question is why Amber freaking Midthunder would need anyone to save her, but don’t worry - she gets in on the action too, eventually.

What follows is a brutal and often silly pursuit that’s refreshing in its scale. This isn’t John Wick blowing through armies of enemies, it’s just some sweet nerd trying to reason with three criminals (and one neo-nazi tattoo artist) as he tracks down Sherry. Nate doesn’t care about the money, and he doesn’t want to hurt anyone. He doesn’t know how to fight and he never really figures it out. What he does have is an ability to keep his composure in painful situations. He’s a human punching bag with a heart of gold, but he’s also a clever one, and the way he puts his condition to work for him is a delight. I don’t want to spoil the kills, which are genuinely and inventively cringe-inducing, but I do want to give you a taste of Nate’s fighting style and the way it leverages his own pain for gain. When a gun lands in a deep fryer, Nate reaches in and grabs it - sporting third degree burns on his hand for the rest of the runtime. At one point he pounds his fists into shards of glass and then does a bizarre Wolverine leap as he uses the glass like teeny-tiny claws. Another memorable scene involves Nate being tortured, which he can’t feel. He has to stall for time, though, so he pretends it hurts as his fingernails are yanked out with pliers, and it’s basically an homage to Paul Reubens in the Buffy The Vampire Slayer movie (think lots of “Oooh! Ahhh! Oooh! Eeee! Oh no!”).

Directors Dan Berk and Robert Olsen (Significant Other) stage the impressive action sequences while leaving plenty of room for comedy and romance, and it’s that balance that makes Novocaine something special. It wouldn’t work, though, without the cast, and the bench is solid. Betty Gabriel and Matt Walsh play the detectives on the case, who aren’t sure whether Nate is an inside man for the robbers or just a good Samaritan, and Jacob Batalon is in his Spider-Man Ned zone as Nate’s online gamer pal who gets called in to assist the guy he’s never met. Ray Nicholson plays the gleefully deranged leader of the robbers, and I’m sure I should have something to say about pitting two nepo babies against each other, but who cares. Nicholson holds his own, but Quaid is the secret sauce. He’ll never be typecast as a secret assassin or anything, but “bank manager in an unexpected situation” is a niche I’d keep buying tickets to watch. Between this and Companion, Quaid is doing just fine leveraging his specific type in all kinds of genres.

Novocaine hit theaters on March 14, 2025.